Faced with grinding poverty, diminishing aid and intense pressures to provide for their families, they felt they had no choice but to submit. It was a story I would hear from other refugee men and boys, many of whom were working without a legal permit. He felt he couldn’t refuse because he had to care for his mother and two sisters his despair and shame were palpable. He described how his boss demanded sexual favours before paying his wages. An 18-year-old Syrian man who was working two jobs was the first person to tell me about it. What surprised me most were accounts of sexual exploitation at work. A few women said that their sons were too scared to go to school, afraid of being sexually assaulted on the way or at the school by their peers. People said that after having fled to neighbouring countries, some younger boys were being sexually victimised by older boys and men, who lured them with promises of food or money. I heard that phrase a number of times from refugees across the three countries.
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Other refugees told me how armed groups would conduct raids on homes, during which “they raped everyone” – both women and men. We cannot think of any family who doesn’t have someone. I asked them to guesstimate how many men in the camp had undergone sexual violence while in detention. According to them, men and boys are routinely sexually abused during detention in Syria, a comment echoed by other refugees, and scores of men had been detained by different armed groups. At a large refugee camp in Jordan, I met a group of women who were eager to talk about the issue. The accounts were heart-rending and horrific. I met one man who suffered from painful and debilitating injuries as a result of sexual torture, and a few aid workers said anal injuries were not uncommon for men who had been detained. Some were not able to work because of the physical and mental impact of the violence, putting their families at risk of poverty. After his release, he stopped eating and became an alcoholic, dying from liver failure soon after.Ī number of women described how men changed after these experiences – isolating themselves, no longer interested in sex, and at times becoming violent. While in detention, his captors sexually tortured him. In Jordan, one young Syrian man told me about his uncle, who had been randomly detained. The experience had left him devastated, and he was too emotionally distraught to work, even though he had to care for his younger sister. He told me how armed men had entered his village and raped him.
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In Lebanon, a Palestinian man who had lived his entire life in Syria asked to speak with me after the group discussion. We cannot think of any family who doesn’t have someone who was detained and sexually abused As I met with more and more refugees – almost 200 across Iraqi Kurdistan, Jordan and Lebanon – I received similar responses, and was inundated with heartbreaking stories.
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Had they heard any accounts from someone they knew personally? Again, resounding replies of “yes” from the men. I was also sceptical: rumours are rampant in war zones. I was surprised at their response and their candour. They looked at me incredulously, as if they couldn’t believe that I was asking such a basic question, saying: “Yes, of course. Once we had established some rapport, I tentatively probed whether they had heard of any reports of sexual violence against men or boys in Syria. I asked them about their lives in the camp, how they were getting by, and what their main concerns were. I met with the first group, eight Syrian men who had fled the war. The UNHCR arranged for a translator and discussions with refugees at a nearby camp. In October 2016, I landed in Erbil, the capital of Iraqi Kurdistan, where more than 200,000 Syrian refugees had fled. I worried that few refugees would have heard of any accounts and that they wouldn’t talk to me about such a taboo topic anyway. Drawing on a few existing reports, I assumed some boys were being victimised, as well as some men in detention centres, but that sexual violence against males was not common. We knew that many women and girls were being targeted for rape and other sexualised violence, but we didn’t know much about what was happening to men and boys. L ast year I agreed to undertake a fact-finding mission for the UN refugee agency, UNHCR, on sexual violence against men and boys in the Syrian crisis.